Cooking
by outerelf
Summary: It was a stress reliever, one that he rather liked. Not that he knew of his secret guard.


The car silently drove down the twisting, turning road, every sensor alert. It was about one o'clock in the morning, when drunks had finally left for home, druggies had wrapped themselves up, and there was a strange lull in the inter-city life.

There was no stopping it, but there could be a lull, and the car took full advantage of this fact as he slowly inched his way down the narrow, twisted street. A flash of dim lighting reflected off an odd red symbol, revealing its red and white paint job for a single moment.

It turned sharply, parking in front of a building that looked out of place compared to the buildings around it. This was spacious, mostly clean, and the doors were locked, but that was of no problem.

The car slid neatly into an overhang, obscuring it from view of everyone, making him look like he was simply part of the wall, before a woman abruptly appeared on the sidewalk.

It was a slightly plump woman, one completely unremarkable in every way. No features to mark her apart, other then there was firmness in her eyes that most placed down to motherhood and its leadership qualities. The woman circled around the car, the trunk popping open on its own.

She lifted out a box, before stepping across to the building, and fumbling with the keys for a moment. At last she managed to open up the door, and slip into the building. There was supposed to be paid employees here, guarding, but they knew her, and would've been monitoring her ever since she came in.

Quickly she slid the box onto a table, before turning to walk outside and grab more. A tall man loomed over her, smiling. "Hey, you're back. We were afraid that you wouldn't be coming back after the last guy tried to grope you."

"I simply haven't had the time to come back since then. I hardly think someone trying to… grope me would be a determent." She began to inch around the large man, "If you'll excuse me, I still have some boxes-"

"Are you crazy rich or something to be able to bring all of this extra food?"

"No, I am not rich, I simply plan my money accordingly."

"Yeah, yeah- Here, allow me to help."

"NO!" She paused, slightly off balanced, before her mouth turned downwards. "No thank you. I can do it. You better get back to your rounds. I noticed the windows don't latch properly and are easy to break into."

"Hmph, maybe you'd like to take over security for me, and let me do the cooking?"

"I hardly think that would be conducive for the Soup Kitchen, but after I have unloaded the boxes, I suppose I can make a few patrols with you."

The man frowned down at her, "At least let me carry the boxes inside of the building if you still won't let me see the car you bring all of this raw stuff in with. You're in charge of which oven again?"

"The one in the far left." The woman tossed that casually over her shoulder, before stepping back outside. He watched as she rounded the corner, before his eyes went heavenward for patience as he began hauling the box to the oven.

Hours slowly began to trickle by as the woman began prepping the food, alternately talking softly with the man, checking the menu for what was about to be served. She stepped from corner to corner of the room, her eyes sometimes going blank as a scan came from the car.

At last, around five o'clock in the morning, the doors opened to allow a flood of chattering people- mostly women, intermixed with a few men- inside. "Oh, hey, if it isn't Renae! How you doing? Please tell me you didn't come here at four in the morning again-"

"No, I didn't."

"Yeah, she came at one in the morning instead." Came back the grumble from the man. "I betchya five she'll be dead on her feet before we get halfway through the day."

"Deal!"

The Soup Kitchen slowly came alive as each person took place at where they were supposed to be, some at the ovens, some elsewhere, getting ready for the first wave of hungry men, women, and children about to come to them for food.

Time slowly passed, the woman's tense, and almost angry form slowly relaxing into a much less defensive stance as she cooked. People began daring to venture questions to her, which she answered. Day passed, falling into night, before her completely relaxed posture dragged her out the door, waving goodbye to the security guard. The security guard turned, and the woman disappeared.

The Lamborghini sighed in relief as he eased out of the hole he had stuffed himself in, turning off the holomatter of the woman. The woman disappeared, and he slowly began his torturous way out of the twisting roads, and back onto a main road proper.

Every single cable screamed of exhaustion from keeping up the holomatter form, and still trying to make sure he had enough time to do a periodic scan to make sure none of the local gang members attempted to take off with his wheels or any other part of him.

Quickly he began running an internal diagnostic test, tired enough not to notice the jet, a mere dot up in the air, following him. He slowly began curving off of the road, before straightening himself. If he kept this up, he was going to be pulled over by the police and be charged with drunk driving.

With a low internal groan, the Lamborghini rerouted himself onto a little-used road, heading towards where the Ark had landed. Prowl was no doubt wondering where he was- "RED ALERT!"

Red Alert attempted not to wince as Prowls voice broke over the comm. link, shouting his name. Something had to of gone wrong in the day he had been gone. "Here Prowl."

"Finally! Why weren't you responding to your comm. link, or your pagers?" Red Alert cursed the holomatter form he was forced to use to cook. Already he could feel the stress that had melted away as he cooked come back, making his wires taunt with worry.

"I left a note that I would not be able to contact back anyone whom attempted to contact me on my form for being able to take the day off." Red Alert replied defensively.

Prowl was not amused. "We had an emergency. Starscream was spotted in the area in which you had disappeared into, and we wanted to contact you to determine if you could locate the jet."

Sensors instantly began up and running, as the jet far above hastily rolled away, shooting off to the right. "Starscream is just over passed me, heading off to the right."

"Very well then." A short silence fell as Red Alert pulled off to the side, slowly stopping, waiting for orders. "Come back to the Ark immediately. Later we will talk about your 'inability' to not contact us."

"Yes." Red Alert sighed. Out of all days to get on Prowls bad side, today would have to be one of them. And here he had just gotten out from the Soup Kitchen all nicely relaxed and happy- Prowl comm. link clicked off, to be replaced with Inferno.

"Red? Red, ya alright Red? Prowl said he just managed to contact you-"

"Inferno, I can take care of myself, and of course I am perfectly fine. I will be at your location in a few moments."

"Alright Red… Is it true that Starscream was in the same area as you?"

"He wasn't in reach of my scanners until recently Inferno." Red Alert snapped crossly. Already his entire reason for going to the soup kitchen had been destroyed.

High above, the jet slowly rolled back around, tagging along nearly a mile behind. Red Alert didn't notice as he hit a pothole, and bounced on his tired shock absorbers. "Slaggit!" The Lamborghini hissed, before his sensors caught the Arks regular noise.

The jet at last pulled off, twisting away.

-----------

Prowl didn't like the pattern he was seeing. He didn't like it one, little bit. As of late, whenever Red Alert was under particular stress, and it was beginning to show, he would disappear for about a day. After he came, he would be much more relaxed.

But along with this disappearance, there would be no way to contact him. Even Inferno wasn't exactly certain where he was going. Red Alert refused to say anything, merely taking off without a single word.

Jazz leaned on the table. "Red just submitted his papers to take off again, didn't he?"

"Yes, today in an hour. I do believe having someone blow up your main security console and being forced to completely transfer all data from it to another and then filling in those gaps from memory constitutes as stress."

Jazz winced as a tired knock came at the door. Red Alert leaned in a moment later, "Prowl, I'm off." He looked exhausted, unsurprisingly, but he held himself with the ever-present wariness that characterized him when he was especially exhausted.

"Very well then."

Red Alert left, as Prowl returned back to his work, finger tapping against the table. Jazz sighed as he leaned against the table, watching Prowl beneath his visor for a few moments, before turning away. "Hey, Jazz, Prowl, sensors picked up Starscream. He's headed towards the city. It looks like he's tailing Red."

"What? Get him! Now!"

----

Starscream hovered midair, optics tracking the Lamborghini that tiredly wound his way through the roads, and into the inner city. He still couldn't believe that out of all mechs Red Alert would willingly go somewhere he could be torn apart, carjacked, or damaged to go to a slagging _soup kitchen_.

Yet, here was Red Alert, and here he was, trying to make sure that the idiotic Lamborghini wouldn't get too badly damaged while in his holomatter form. _Why do I even care? Why?_ Starscream received no answer to his theoretical question, nor did he expect one. Red Alert was something that he and only he could pick on and damage-

Starscream flinched as a missile whizzed dangerously close, and he turned as fast as he could to the side to see what was attacking him. "What the slag?" He muttered. Silverbolt streaked past him, and Starscream could've kicked himself. He had forgotten about the Autobots.

"You have got to be kidding me-" Starscream muttered, firing up his main guns. "-why does this slagging have to happen to me now? Especially when the pit-slagging Autobot is entering the city!"

"C'mon Decepti-scum! I can take you on!"

_Will they ever think up of any better insults?_

Starscream fired at the overeager Aerialbot, mentally shaking his head at the childlike behavior. The Aerialbot screamed around the bigger jet, before recklessly charging.

The older, much more experienced Decepticon transformed for a split second, slamming a fist into the cockpit, before transforming again, barrel-rolling away. Normally he would've drawn out the fight for his own amusement, but Red Alert often switched Soup Kitchens, depending on his mood. The worse his mood, the further into inner city he would retreat, where more helpers would be needed.

Starscream scanned the ground below him. _Great, I lost him._ He was going to kill the next Autobot he came across if they were the reason why Red Alert got damaged because he wasn't there to guard the paranoid Lamborghini.

------

The human male stared at the sweet ride in stunned surprise, wondering who was an idiot enough to actually leave behind an super-expensive vehicle in _this_ neighborhood. Whomever had done it had to be stupid, and he was going to do them a favor and teach them a lesson they would never forget.

Silently he slid up to the vehicle, running an appreciative hand down the sleek curve. This could get him some _real_ money, not the usual crap he got from selling cars to Junkers.

His head turned, casually checking for anybody close by, before he drew out a car pick. If he were lucky, this wouldn't be one of the cars electrical keys. Even if it did-

Within moments he had slid behind the wheel, and found that the keys were in the ignition. _Stupid idiot. Ah well, good luck for me. Maybe… I should so totally show this off for my girlfriend._

The teenaged boy turned the keys in the ignition, listening to the engine softly purr into action. He smirked, earrings flashing in the dim lighting as his hand fell on the gearshift, smoothly bringing it from 'Park' to 'Drive'.

The Lamborghini pulled out of the parking spot, not really seeming to notice. They passed by an empty building where a woman looked up out of a window. He could see her eyes widen, as she stiffened, and the car unexpectedly nearly ground to a halt. "What, come on, you stupid piece of junk, work!" He swore violently at the car, before stepping on the pedal. He somehow doubted the woman would allow him to take off with her car.

The car reluctantly began moving, though he could swear that it was attempting to resist. "Stupid thing." He grumbled under his breath.

For his part, Red Alert was horrified. Here he had been cooking, silently pouring all frustrations with the Ark into it, and then someone had to come and car jack him! He couldn't do anything about them driving, other then completely stalling his engine. And that would be impossible, because if he stalled his engine then they would just strip his insides.

His holomatter form was completely useless- he was already shutting it off to save energy. The form dissolved, and he returned his attention to the male, sitting in his driver seat, silently checking his energy levels and options for escape.

Red Alert groaned as he was forced to turn a corner. His energy levels were too low to put up anything more then a token resistance at this point. He couldn't even call the Autobots for help. The comm. link would transfer itself automatically to the 'radio' and the teen would figure out something was up, either that or break his eardrums while listening.

_Next time maybe I should bring along someone else. Just so that way it won't be like this. Why today? Why today of all days? Where is he taking me?_

The car pulled up to a slightly run down apartment building, and the man leaned out the window, honking the horn loudly. Red Alert fumed in frustration, wouldn't the brat get _out_ already so that way he could take off?

In response a sleep tousled head poked out of the window- "What is it now you f-" The females voice broke off as she stared down at the sleek, expensive, oddly painted Lamborghini sitting in front of the apartment.

Red Alerts energon processor began to sink. If he survived this, then he would never, ever tell anyone about what had happened, no matter what. This was embarrassing, and he was ashamed to even admit that this was happening to himself- it wasn't every day you could say you were car jacked and you were kidnapped by two organic squishies that didn't even come up to your _knee_.

There was the sound of a jet flying overhead, and Red Alert sighed miserably. Being taken captive by the Decepticons would've been better then this- at least then he had an actual excuse, not to mention he knew what happened then. This was simply insane-

"Hey- you, punk."

The kids head jerked up, as Red Alerts spark stopped pulsing for a moment at the scowling man standing in the middle of the road. The teenaged kid head jerked to the man, and a breathed obscentity mirrored Red Alerts feelings exactly. "Out of the car. Now."

"Or what are you gonna do-" The kid tried for a sneer, but it broke off as the mans hand balled into a meaty fist. The kid wasted no extra time to scramble out of the car, and into the apartment building. His girlfriend hurled choice words from her safe perch up above.

Red Alert inched backwards as the human approached, not yet ready to run the human over, but not certain if he was up to driving backwards. The human snorted, "Idiot. Better get out of here before the kid comes back with friends."

The man stepped aside, and Red Alert eagerly seized upon his chance to drive off.

Above the jet followed after carefully, this time making sure to stay out of Autobot sensors, as he gave the mech a silent escort home.

* * *

a/n: yay for plot bunnies. Don't ask about the hologram, and I won't be forced to kill you. But review please. Plot bunny comes from the bunny farm.


End file.
